This one is describing the mechanics in Part III: Starting a New Chapter from pages 27 to 29 in the rules (this chart would go on page 30).
Does the "parallel boxes" thing make sense? Should I just collapse the "roll ___ dice" boxes into a single box?]]>
Page 1 is a smaller, narrower font. Page 2 is just smaller, not narrower. Page 3 is the same as the first post, for comparison.
Is the text still readable in the smaller sizes? Do the more verbose explanations work better?
I'm also realizing that the charts aren't rendering exactly the same when I paste them into OpenOfffice Writer from OpenOffice Draw -- the text is nicely contained in the boxes in Draw, but is creeping outside the boundaries in Writer, and therefore the PDF I posted. Hopefully I can work that out.]]>
Have you tried using smaller text
Only one box at a time, when I was trying to cram the text in, and then I would usually give up because the smaller text would look strange relative to the rest of the chart. Until now it hadn't occurred to me to experiment with shrinking all the text, but I will try some experiments.
How much do you find players “grubbing for traits” in play (i.e. narrating spurious or unsatisfying things into the fiction in order to gain dice)?
In the previous version I actually had the opposite problem -- the old action dice mechanic made it so risky to use multiple traits at once that it rarely ever happened. I haven't tested the new action dice exhaustion mechanic yet, but I'm hoping that it incentivizes people to use 1 or 2 or maybe 3 traits at a time -- the idea is that rolling more dice will make you more likely to win (i.e. that you'll have at least one very high die) but that you'll do less "damage" if you do (because if you roll multiple dice odds are also good that you'll have at least one very low die, which is less likely to exhaust an opponent's traits). This is the biggest mechanical change in this new version, so it's the thing I'll be paying closest attention to on my next round of testing.]]>
How much do you find players "grubbing for traits" in play (i.e. narrating spurious or unsatisfying things into the fiction in order to gain dice)?]]>
I could use some feedback on whether the text in Part IV makes sense, and whether adding this flowchart into that section would help (or any other feedback, like ways to make the chart better, areas where the organization of the rules is making them hard to digest, etc.).]]>
It's also (I hope), a perfect introduction to what your game is about. I hope the rest of your game's rules fulfill that promise, because it's a good promise.
I hope it delivers, too. I'm not 100% confident that I've got the game I want yet, but I know I'm at least fixing problems in the draft I'm working on, which I'll hopefully be done with soon.]]>
That introduction is a really clear, engaging, articulate essay on why you love fantasy. It's also (I hope), a perfect introduction to what your game is about. I hope the rest of your game's rules fulfill that promise, because it's a good promise.
What you love about fantasy isn't what I love about fantasy, but it is a coherant visions, well communicated.]]>
The biggest change in Part 1 is that there's now a running example that follows a set of imaginary players through the procedures as I explain them. Do the examples help? I'm a little concerned about the "running" nature of them may be confusing, so feedback on that point will be helpful for me.
Also, throughout all the examples in the text I'm using the same four imaginary players (Susan, Fred, Peter, and Annie) although the context for the different examples changes, as if they were all excerpted from different sessions of the game. I am trying to establish a sense of familiarity by reusing the same names, and also convey the idea that you could play the game again and again to generate a different story each time, but I worry that not keeping the players and the fictional situations synchronized may cause confusion. Any thoughts on that?
Also, is the diagram on page 5 helpful or confusing?]]>
Thoughts or feedback on either the form or the content?
I know I've got some layout issues (my goal is to make it as nice as my skills and resources will allow so that I can attract interest and playtesters as I try to move closer to a publishable game) such as the second quote splitting the page. I'm trying to keep this as a two-page digest spread (essentially a two-column landscape letter-sized page) but I'm having a hard time making the text I'm trying to use fit inside that constraint, so layout suggestions (I'm using OpenOffice right now, so my capabilities may be limited) or editing advice will be appreciated.
I'm also a little concerned about the tone. I don't want people to feel that the game is stodgy or stuck in the "roleplaying is very serious business" vein -- the game is supposed to be a celebration of the genre, and I imagine that a lot of the play time will be spent enjoying high adventure rather than deep soul searching.]]>
After talking to Dan in that other thread, I had a kind of breakthrough and re-wrote my rules for dungeons. They're here: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/116449.....0Moves.pdf
I think that they're a pretty accurate presentation of how I've been running dungeons when I playtest the game. What I need to know is if other people can follow these instructions. I'm also not at all sure I've got the Dungeonmaster's agenda right.]]>
On the other hand, if you can get the PDF to generate 2-up, I think it would be fine!]]>